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Flick of the Switch October 31, 2008

Posted by Mistress B in Family, Miss Lou, Parenting.
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Miss Lou has stopped with the hysterical crying and but-Mum-I-can’t-last-that-longs and the sobbing I-just-want-to-come-home-right-nows and the angry I-hate-him-why-can’t-he-leave-us-alones that have punctuated much of our conversations over the past few weeks.

I don’t know what it was, whether she decided that it wasn’t helping her cause, or that she decided that she can be patient while I work it out or perhaps that my breaking into tears one night made her think that she’d pushed things too far or it could be that she’s decided that her socialisation problem at school needs more attention, but whatever the reason she has flicked that little switch in her head and turned everything back off.

It has always amazed me how she can do that. Go from one extreme to calm or sometimes the opposite extreme in an instant. It really is like someone has flicked a switch somewhere and when it happens I always wonder where my child went and who the changling is that is sitting in front of me now or perhaps that should be the other way round.

I’ve always found her ability to shift focus so completely from one thing to another a little disconcerting. I can’t shut myself off like that and shift focus so completely after periods of high emotion. But then I don’t focus so intently on any one thing either as what she can.

Like her sister’s birthday this year.

For the whole time that she was living with the freak, she was very lacksidaisy with keeping up with other people’s birthdays. We had the same problem while she was living here about her not making effort with him. She’s very much an out-of-sight-out-of-mind girl. This year though, CJ received a parcel in the mail. Inside was a handmade card that was more than a folded up and hastily scribbled upon piece of printer paper and a handmade bag that she had taken time to go shopping for materials, hand sewn the seems using stitches I had shown her for embroidery and obviously put a lot of thought into  unlike some of her previous hastily half thrown together ideas or an gift from someone else that she didn’t like or an old posession that she no longer wants. CJ wasn’t sure what to make of all the effort this year after all the let downs of previous ones.

Obviously CJ finds Lou’s ‘on/off’ switch a little disconcerting at times too.

I wonder if we’ll ever get used to her doing that.


Last Friday October 15, 2008

Posted by Mistress B in Family, Miss Lou, Parenting.
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was a very bad day.

After an up and down week with Miss Lou, I had to drive her to the mountains to meet her aunt who she was staying with for the weekend before going back to school yesterday.

She didn’t want to go.

The closer we got to our destination the quieter she got, the more withdrawn she became, the sadder she looked.

When we arrived she refused to speak to her aunt.

She insisted on sitting by herself and wouldn’t be drawn into conversation.

When it was time to go she hopped back in my car and sat there crying, refusing to move.

Everything we talked about through the week about being patient and brave and taking little steps at a time flew out the window.

She just wants to come home. She just wants to be with me. She just wants to be normal and live with her family. As much as she likes her school, she needs to be somewhere that she feels she belongs.

She doesn’t want to be patient. She doesn’t feel brave. She doesn’t think she can do this anymore. It’s all too hard.

Telling her that she had to go back to school this term, that I had to sort things out with her dad before we could decide anything broke my heart.

Even after I coaxed her out of my car and into her aunt’s I had to prise her hands apart to get her to let go of me.

I left quickly so that I couldn’t hear her sobbing or calling to me.

Mountain roads are hard to drive when you have tears in your eyes.

The past few days have been spent in a flurry of phone calls to find information, advice and services to help.

I’m bringing my girl home.

Come hell or high water or tantrums from dad I’m bringing her home.

Simple Pleasures Sunday October 5, 2008

Posted by Mistress B in Family, Kids, Miss Lou.
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A daughter’s delight in her new skirt that mum did make for her

I’m quite pleased with how it turned out and didn’t take long at all to run up.

Screw Up Tuesday June 17, 2008

Posted by Mistress B in Blogging stuff, Funny Stuff, Kids, Miss Lou.
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Screw Up Tuesday share and snigger time once more!

I can’t say as I’ve particuarly screwed up this week. A little forgetfulness here, a little clumsiness there but nothing particuarly blogworthy. I think the best screw up of our week was Miss Lou forgetting her own phone number and wondering why I couldn’t call her. She was most insistant that the last 3 digits of her phone number were  sequential, lets use 987 for example, and we kept getting the message bank of some chick named “Rachel”. Her number actually wasn’t sequential at all (978 to follow the example). I’m betting she’s gotten another irrate email from her dad for giving him the wrong number……….. I wonder how many other people she gave the wrong number to? lol

Everything around me seems to be a screw up at the moment though. The pin in the bottom of my mobile that fits into the charger has busted rendering my phone unable to be charged and dead. There is a slow leak in the radiator of our car which I think may be my fault from where I drove over the gutter last week (don’t ask – no I wasn’t in an accident). And then with the pc being fucked…………… well I think I could be forgiven for thinking that the universe didn’t want me able to travel or talk to anyone at the moment.

Ok. Your turn. Fess up. Blog your bugger ups and leave me a comment so I know to add your link to the honour roll.

TJ the Email Terrorist! March 18, 2008

Posted by Mistress B in Blogging stuff, Kids, Miss Lou, TJ.
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TJ wanted to email Miss Lou.

So last Friday I set him up his own email so that he can email Miss Lou on his own email address. It was SOOOOOOOOOOOO exciting!! I configured his account for Outlook Express and showed him how to find it.

He carefully chose pictures from last weeks excursion to email to her.

It was so cute.

But the cuteness had worn off by today.

Every time I vacate the desk chair he is now in it checking his emails! And wanting to know why Miss Lou hasn’t replied yet. Being at school and study isn’t good enough apparently.

My son can be a little, well, obsessive at times.

Thankfully she finally found time to email him tonight. That had better keep him happy for a few days………….. I have some serious preparing to do before I leave on my camping trip! Besides……….. the computer is mine! MINE I tells ya!

Update on Miss Lou. February 25, 2008

Posted by Mistress B in Birthdays, Family, Kids, Miss Lou, Parenting.
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Just wanted to give all my lovely internets a quick update on how Miss Lou is going.

 She likes her school. *phew*

She seems to have made a few friends.  *phew*

She had a falling out with one of those friends last week which resulted in her nearly getting hit over the head with a guitar *eeek!*

The falling out has been sorted out and now they are friends again (not sure if this is a good thing).

She emailed me around 20 times last week. In 4 days.

She has her new phone and is loving it. We bought it for her for her 14th birthday last week. She promptly started txting me at all hours of the night! *eeek again*

I shall have to explain that txts at 1 am are not a good idea unless she wants mum to die of a heart attack. 😉

She apparently had a few meltdowns during last week. She keeps verbalising that she’s missing me and that’s the reason for everything. I think it’s not so much that the missing us has become more acute, but rather that she’s allowed to say it, so she’s letting out 4 years worth of expressing how she feels.

Her aunt and uncle have been taking her out on Friday nights to see Shakespeare, and last Friday they all went to see Billy Elliot.

She still likes her counsellor and is currently working on controlling her emotions.

She is playing her keyboard again……… and making me listen to her play over the phone lol

So far so good.


Smiley Saturday February 2, 2008

Posted by Mistress B in CJ, Family, Finances, Health, Hubby, Kids, Miss Lou, Ramblings, Recovery, Smiley Saturday.
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Welcome to another edition of Smiley Saturday brought to you by Lightening`s Online

My smiley moments from this week…………………..

* Hubby managed to snaffle himself an extra run. Despite it cutting into our weekend family time, it provides a much needed boost to our budget right at the moment.

* TJ’s new glasses finally showed up on Friday morning and he is happy with his teachers for this year.

* Miss Moo ended up with the home room teacher that I was hoping she would get. Mr H expects a lot from his students and helps keep them grounded as they enter adolescence and approach high school.

* Miss Lou is settling in nicely to her new school (so far). She has made a couple of friends. Likes her room mates and all the teachers she has met……….. she seems quite happy.

* I made the Top 100 Australian Women Bloggers list (hahaha) debuting at number 71!

* I also started my first official day as a moderator over at Aussie Bloggers Forum yesterday. Woohoo   The power, the power!!! lmao

* I also realised that I am not superwoman, was never superwoman and will never be superwoman and need to start thinking and behaving like a mere mortal for a change. (see yesterdays post if this doesnt make sense to you)

To read more Smiley Saturday moments or to share your own, head on over to Lightenings.