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Flick of the Switch October 31, 2008

Posted by Mistress B in Family, Miss Lou, Parenting.

Miss Lou has stopped with the hysterical crying and but-Mum-I-can’t-last-that-longs and the sobbing I-just-want-to-come-home-right-nows and the angry I-hate-him-why-can’t-he-leave-us-alones that have punctuated much of our conversations over the past few weeks.

I don’t know what it was, whether she decided that it wasn’t helping her cause, or that she decided that she can be patient while I work it out or perhaps that my breaking into tears one night made her think that she’d pushed things too far or it could be that she’s decided that her socialisation problem at school needs more attention, but whatever the reason she has flicked that little switch in her head and turned everything back off.

It has always amazed me how she can do that. Go from one extreme to calm or sometimes the opposite extreme in an instant. It really is like someone has flicked a switch somewhere and when it happens I always wonder where my child went and who the changling is that is sitting in front of me now or perhaps that should be the other way round.

I’ve always found her ability to shift focus so completely from one thing to another a little disconcerting. I can’t shut myself off like that and shift focus so completely after periods of high emotion. But then I don’t focus so intently on any one thing either as what she can.

Like her sister’s birthday this year.

For the whole time that she was living with the freak, she was very lacksidaisy with keeping up with other people’s birthdays. We had the same problem while she was living here about her not making effort with him. She’s very much an out-of-sight-out-of-mind girl. This year though, CJ received a parcel in the mail. Inside was a handmade card that was more than a folded up and hastily scribbled upon piece of printer paper and a handmade bag that she had taken time to go shopping for materials, hand sewn the seems using stitches I had shown her for embroidery and obviously put a lot of thought intoΒ  unlike some of her previous hastily half thrown together ideas or an gift from someone else that she didn’t like or an old posession that she no longer wants. CJ wasn’t sure what to make of all the effort this year after all the let downs of previous ones.

Obviously CJ finds Lou’s ‘on/off’ switch a little disconcerting at times too.

I wonder if we’ll ever get used to her doing that.


1. widdleshamrock - October 31, 2008


Well, I say No, because we have similar and I am not fully used to it.

Hope the switch being turned off has lessened the stress on you though.


definitely. The calm side is much easier to deal with than the other. ~ B

2. Gemisht - October 31, 2008

I hope that the switch being off for the moment makes the roller coaster ride a little smoother for you.

Is it like having Jekyl and Hyde around – one minute there is screaming and the end of the world, the next minute we are sweetness and light??? If it is I know what that’s like.

Sending hugs and thinking of you πŸ™‚

Much smoother thanks.

Definitely Jekyl and Hyde like at times – exactly like you’ve described. ~ B

3. Jayne - October 31, 2008

The switch is often flicked in this house, can be very confusing and exhausting.
One day we’ll all trace the wires to that switch and re-jig it so the Christmas tree can blaze in time to “Bohemian Rhapsody” πŸ˜‰

lmao – perhaps we could harness ‘the switch’ as a new source for green energy? ~ B

4. Frogdancer - October 31, 2008

I think I’m glad I’ve got boys…..

πŸ™‚ it’s not a girl thing, it’s a different wiring thing. ~ B

5. widdleshamrock - October 31, 2008

Sorry, just burst out laughing, yes, my switch flickers are boys.

I am wondering how or if girl switch flicker combined with hormones is different to a boy one…..

Saw Bohemian Rhapsody and am slightly head banging to myself.

Bit hard to tell as my boy isn’t a switch flicker, so I can’t really compare. ~ B

6. Gemisht - October 31, 2008

WS I would think that flick switching and hormones with either sex is a lethal combination. Maybe, just maybe, a hormonal girl with a sensitive safety switch would be slightly worse.

Perhaps, or maybe the hormones just make their switch flick a little more often or something?

And LMAO at Jayne with Bohemian Rhapsody. Perfect idea. Can you get that organised in time for this Christmas, or next year maybe πŸ™‚

lmao πŸ˜† ~ B

7. river - October 31, 2008

My switch flicker is also male. I’m not sure I have quite the same situation but his moods can change from fine and reasonable to throwing things rage in an instant. Usually I’ll say something the wrong way or laugh at the wrong moment and he just doesn’t “get” teasing at all. I grew up with teasing and sarcasm, lots of jokes and laughing (well, once I’d finished school and went to live with mum), my kids were raised the same, so for me to now have to think twice about everything I say isn’t easy. Sometimes I forget……..

That can be very draining. My younger brother was like that. Still is impossible to get along with as you never know what he’ll take offense to. hugs.

I’m betting there’ll be quite a bit of adjustment once Lou is living with you on a permanent basis, but I also know you are strong enough to cope and get through this.

Yes, there will be more adjustment once she comes home, but I’m sure it won’t be any worse than when she left πŸ™‚ ~ B

8. Trish - October 31, 2008

I hope things improve soon.Way beyond my realm of experience except I have a teenager who flicks my switch all the time.

lol – I know what it’s like to have my switches flicked that’s for sure πŸ˜‰ ~ B

9. Kin - November 1, 2008

But at least the high drama is over yeah?

Yeah. ~ B

10. trishatruly - November 4, 2008

Oh, Gawd! I am sooo glad to have left that whole mess behind…..except WAIT! I haven’t! My oldest daughter is preggers so she is now the one going goofy and making me crazy trying to figure out which she is at any given moment: Jekyll or Hyde.
God bless us mothers. Hormones…….. sheeeit!

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