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Mother’s Day Gifts. May 9, 2008

Posted by Mistress B in Family, Funny Stuff, Ramblings.
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I hate the hype surrounding Mother’s Day presents. The invitation is to spoil mum and to spoil mum you need to spend, spend, spend. It seems to me that Mother’s Day has become, like everything else, a bit of a pissing contest regarding buying the biggest, most expensive or extravagant presents and like most families we can’t afford to part with hundreds of dollars on fancy shit that I don’t need.

It also seems to me that Mother’s Day is an invitation to treat all mothers, regardless of age, like doddering old nana’s.

You don’t think so? Have another look at those ads. Many of the ads on telly right now are pushing gifts that might be suitable for my mother, but nothing that grabs my attention, especially the damn music compilation cd’s. I mean seriously! Three CD + bonus DVD packs of Human Nature? Damien Leath sings the hits of the 60’s & 70’s? Come on! I was a teen of the 80’s. Give me Gun’s n Roses or Aerosmith or Bon Jovi for fucks sake!

Or how about the choices of suitable Mother’s Day gift DVD’s as displayed in the latest store catalogues. Tell me Mr Lets-commercialise-the-absolute-crap-out-of-every-occasion, do I look old enough to be the kind of person who would appreciate Elvis or Jerry Lewis movies as a gift just because they have a bit of pink wrapping on them? *rolls eyes* Get your goddam act together commercialising bastard.

While we are questioning the wisdom of Mr Lets-commercialise-everything, I feel compelled to ask exactly how many dressing gowns or fluffy slippers does he think mums need? And do they all HAVE to have hearts or flowers or cutesy animal prints all over them? What about those of us are who aren’t fluffy, fuzzy, cutesy flowered/animal/heart loving types? Do they even make PLAIN coloured dressing gowns these days?

The question I’d most like answered though is how giving mum’s MORE kitchen appliances makes their lives better? Do I really need more options for how to slave cook for my family? Do I really need another appliance to clean, take up space in my cupboards and lose the electrical cord for?

Isn’t the day about showing appreciation to mothers? About our demon spawn children getting down on their knees to worship us thanking us for the affection and care that we show them by allowing them to live, eat and sleep in our homes on a daily basis?

Give me a break!

No really.

That’s what I want for Mother’s Day.

A break.

From people fussing, whining and whinging at me. From people asking me stupid questions that they already know the answers to. From people wanting stuff and shit and stuff. From being expected to make decisions and having to push and prod everyone around me to try to get anything done, then giving up in disgust to do everything myself.

But even the idea of giving mums a break from the drudgery of cooking and cleaning for their family is being touted as opportunity to commercialise and spend up big. It would seem they really think that chucking in chocolate ice cream is going to get more people to eat KFC? If I want some fatty rubber I’ll pour a bottle of oil over a tyre thank you very much. Your puny bucket of ice cream ain’t gonna suck me in Colonel.

Honestly people, if you are going to treat mum to a meal she doesn’t have to cook, and are inclined to fork out money to do so, take her to a real restaurant.

Me, I’d be happy for someone else to cook. Then let me eat in peace. Before my food goes cold because you are bitching that you want something else. That is my idea of mommy bliss. Now if I was to also be able to walk out into the kitchen after my still warm meal and find that someone else had stacked the dishwasher and wiped down the bench, I’d be ecstatic in my blissfulness.

And while we’re going, how about someone else do all the freakin ironing for a change? It’s not like it’s even my clothes! 😉


1. Anja - May 9, 2008

Do I have to call my mother for mother’s day?

Geez, I hate this time of year.

2. widdleshamrock - May 9, 2008

I read a comment on Iron Puglist’s site which keeps sticking with me.

“Where duty begins, friendship ends.’

I resent that these days have become an obligation and duty rather than something enjoyable.

3. leechbabe - May 9, 2008

Annie was only a week old when I got to celebrate mothers day. My MIL took Annie for the night so I could get some sleep, then she came over and cleaned the house, top to bottom. Best mothers day gift ever, then again after having six children I think she knew what worked.

Personally I really like the ‘donate to breast cancer research’ gift idea. Although Annie saw the ad and asked if she could give me ‘breast cancer’ for mothers day 😀

4. imnomartha - May 9, 2008

I am way too lucky – mother has her birthday too close to MD to bother about and Mine is also close enough, I get to circle things I’d like…. only to have nothing purchased anyway. 🙄

And hell yes, the best present ever is a break from the whines, the get me this now, the what’s for dinner questions. Without a doubt.

5. Darla - May 9, 2008

I just want 10# off my waistline. Too much to ask?

6. Jayne - May 9, 2008

An empty house this Sunday, with the males doing some male bonding over the innards of a heritage train engine, will be the best Mother’s Day pressie for moi 😉

7. planningqueen - May 9, 2008

My birthday falls on mother’s day this year so I want a double break!!!

BTW. All my technical troubles are over finally and to celebrate my 100th post I have a free e-book to download that you might be interested in called Planning With Kids Top 100 Tips.

8. tiff - May 9, 2008

hmmm, my perfect mother’s day?
A full night’s sleep and a clean house. Sounds perfect to me…
Really, though, Mother’s day is for the kids. Mine love to make me brekkie in bed (and then eat it all themselves) while I unwrap my gifts (and then fight over who gave the best gift). Lunch is usually in a restaurant (where I am tense because the kids are not behaving) or at home where Dave cooks…I just prepare the salads and the desserts.
Ahhh, Mother’s Day! Secretly I love it all.

9. Kelli - May 9, 2008

I so here you – forget the presents, just leave me alone for the day! In fact, clean the house & go & just let me wallow in the cleanliness – for at least 5 minutes without anything else getting messed up!

10. frogpondsrock - May 9, 2008

I am getting bacon and eggs for breakfast ner ner

11. harrietarcher - May 9, 2008

Well, because I am borderline insane, I am cooking lunch. I wanted to make a fancy schmancy Afternoon Tea with lots of yummy little things – but the bloke decided that afternoon tea means you don’t want them around for lunch, and they can nick off before dinner…

Ok, he has a point…

And he’s not actually wrong…

That indeed *was* my plan…

I am getting a carefully selected gift from the school Mother’s Day stall from my darling son. He wanted to buy me a book (thoughtful boy!)

My birthday’s in less than two weeks, so I am happy to hold out for something good then!

12. Kin - May 9, 2008

I agree with everything everyone has said!

13. mylittledrummerboys - May 10, 2008

100% agree – with you – forget the fluffy presents and ancient DVD.s/CD leave me alone for the day too (with my internet or a nice bubble bath and personal masseuse !
Yep, clean the house top to bottom and let me bask in the glory of it for a day.
I am gettign bacon ,eggs, hash brown, toast and grilled tomato …. I am gonna draw or print a picture.

14. Teresa McNamara - May 10, 2008

I so get where you are coming from. I’ve bought my own presents and planned the day for myself. We’re having breakfast at the Coffee Club and I’ll buy myself a bunch of flowers from Woolies. And I’ve washed and ironed as much as possible today to justify spending some quality time crafting tomorrow

15. Naomi - May 11, 2008

I read this on Friday and I’m still snickering early on Sunday over the funny bits.

Oh yeah, I got a chance to see the sunrise as a mothers’ day pressie this year 😀

16. leechbabe - May 11, 2008

I thought of this post this morning as I got up before dawn – before the birds even.

Hubby has a head cold and this seems to mean he can’t even put his used teabags in the rubbish and he needs a clean cup each time he makes a drink. So now I have a gazilion cups left all over the house in varying states of empty / full. And his entire family will be here in 4 hours – hubby is of course in bed asleep and I’m madly trying to get the place ready.

Something is wrong with my mothers day.

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