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I’m still tired…………….. February 1, 2008

Posted by Mistress B in Fire, Goals, Health, Housekeeping, Hysterectomy, Ramblings, Recovery.
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Early last year I became anaemic.  I was so run down that I would HAVE TO nap three sometimes four times a day. If I didn’t  I would often get to a point where I would drop off to sleep no matter where or what I was doing simply because my body had really had enough and needed to shut down for a bit. (The most dramatic example of this was my kitchen fire last year.) If I tried to do something “normal” like working in the school canteen or going to do a big grocery shop, I would literally need to sleep for most of the next day or two (sometimes three). As it progressed I gradually cut all of my activities, prayer group, bible study, sewing group, brigade, helping at the kids school, swimming, gym, church. I didn’t have the energy for any of them. Just leaving the house to sit at someone else’s house for a couple of hours was incredibly taxing.

And people didn’t understand. I mean I looked OK. I was taking vitamin supplements wasn’t I? And I didn’t understand. I was taking supplements damn it!

Then the doctors decided that I should have a hysterectomy. Six to eight weeks for initial recovery they tell me, six to twelve months for full recovery. I’m at 9 weeks. My recovery from the op was easy. Not much pain or discomfort. I was very lucky. I thought to myself “Six to eight weeks. That will put me as being back on track by the time school starts back and I’ll be able to jump back into things where I had to leave off 8 months ago.”

I am so stupid. I’m still tired. And while I might be mostly recovered from the immediate effects of my operation, I’m not recovered from everything that led up to it. The busyness of the past few days with back to school routine has knocked me on my ever widening arse!  Just getting up with the kids in the mornings, keeping a very basic household routine through the day (no heavy cleaning involved) and getting everyone’s reading/music practice/books covered/lunches made at night is exhausting me.

I realised while I was reading Naomi’s blog the other night that I had some really unrealistic expectations of myself. I thought that having had my op and having been on supplements for six months that I should be OK by now. I didn’t take into account that the problem causing the anaemia started 19 months ago,  wasn’t solved until  late November and that the supplements had been a mere stop gap to prevent it getting worse, not make it better,  so even though I’ve been taking the supplements for so long, it’s only in the past few days that I can tell that my levels are starting to return to normal.

How do I know?

My pee has turned yellow. (Weren’t expecting that answer were you?) That really bright fluro yellow that your pee goes when your vitamin supplements aren’t all being used up and are flushing through your body. The whole time that I have been taking these supplements, this is the first time that has happened.

I really need to remember that it took me nineteen months to get that sick, so I need to give myself more than two months to get better. So instead of vainly trying to jump back into my busy old life, I’m now going to continue to take things easy. I’m going to sit down with my family and explain that ‘mum isn’t quite ready to be normal again’ (and they’ll say “were you ever normal?”) and re divvy up the household chores. I’m going to slowly add activities back into my week, one at a time, over the next twelve months starting with helping at the school canteen once a month (late this month). I’m going to think about my choices of where I put my time and energy and cut completely the things that I find draining………….. I’m thinking that this time NEXT year is a much more realistic time frame for feeling like I should have everything all back together again.

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Comments

1. Anja - February 1, 2008

Prioritise and delegate.

Your internals have healed but the body takes a long time to recover from surgical trauma. It will get back on track. Be kind to yourself.

2. widdleshamrock - February 1, 2008

Hugs B, what the wise one said.

Be kind to yourself. One day at a time.

Very wise observations there.

3. Marita - February 1, 2008

Yep take it slow and recover fully before launching back into life. Otherwise the recovery takes even longer.

4. Veronica - February 1, 2008

(((hugs))) and I think I know where you are at. I have CFS and have done for 6 years now. I have good days and bad days, but on the bad days I need to cut myself some slack.

(((more hugs))) here is to a complete recovery. And WOOT for the bright yellow pee!

5. magneto bold too - February 1, 2008

Babe, I was so badly anemic after having Moo I was fainting all the time. I needed iron injections in my arse for 6 months. AFTER 3 blood transfusions.

WHY are you not having iron injections?

I swear I felt like I could take on the world after those injections. And the blood transfusions? Man that was good shit! LMAO

6. Bettina - February 1, 2008

oh gawd! not MORE injections. I already have to have my B12 injected every 8 weeks.

7. Gemisht - February 1, 2008

Hugs Babe. Why is it so easy for us to all acknowledge what we should be doing for our own benefit, but soooo hard to actually do it.

I really hope that you can take things easy so that you do get 100% well, or at least 90%.

Yay for the bright yellow pee, thats great. May it continue as a sign of your recovery.

8. Naomi - February 1, 2008

*applause*

In honour of your realisation, I’ve decided to scrap TAFE plans for this semester. I was hoping to work 4 days a week and study 1/2 a day. This seemed sensible. Ye gads.

9. dancingwithfrogs - February 2, 2008

Take it slow. I can imagine how annoying it must be to have to do that, but you’ll be doing no one any favours if you slide back down to being really sick again. Gotta love bright yellow!

10. FreeFromItAll - February 2, 2008

(((HUGS)))) You just explained my life in the first 2 paragraphs – just insert CFS/FM instead of anemia. Naps, naps and more naps and days to recover after outings.

*sigh*

Hope you feel better soon girlfriend!

11. Jayne - February 2, 2008

You sure you didn’t have a nasty dose of Glandular Fever in amongst all that too?
Take it s.l.o.w.l.y woman and put your feet up at least every 12 hours out of 24 😉

12. Smiley Saturday « Dances to the beet of her own drum - February 2, 2008

[…] never be superwoman and need to start thinking and behaving like a mere mortal for a change. (see yesterdays post if this doesnt make sense to […]


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